Remember what you did three Christmas's ago or what you got? I bet not. This one will stick in the hard drive for awhile, I won't claim forever cuz if I live through the heart attacks and cancer that swim in my gene pool, there's a good chance I'll get Alzheimer's. But until then, I'm gonna remember X-mas 2011.
The other Shane and his wife, Laura were already at Two-step beach when I arrived. They organized the gathering for folks that didn't have friends or family outside of the flight school to celebrate with. I got there at the same time that they realized that both sets of keys were locked safely inside the car. A perfect opportunity to bust out my dish to pass, a gallon of Sangria. Pretty good but I went overboard with the ginger. Not as much as Dan's ginger wine, but too much.
The beach runs for a couple of miles with little patches of sand in between large swatches of lava rock. Groups of revelers filled the flat spots. We walked about half a mile to a cluster of houses and explained the situation. The old woman made a lovely sound that was a mixture of concern and merriment when we asked her for a coat hanger.
Jork showed up just in time to see us give up on the coat hanger and decide to break a window with a rock. The pumice kept breaking in our hands so the other Shane went to return the twisted hanger and see if the old lady had a hammer. Meanwhile, Laura took the flat head screwdriver from the tool kit on the back of my bike and pried the window out.
Then, wait for it...the alarm blared. I spent some of my youth hanging out listening to a band called "Vegetable Spit" practice so my hearing isn't full strength and the alarm hurt my ears. I bet folks for miles up and down the beach cursed us. A local came over to help us. He thought he knew how to reset the system and stop the alarm. He didn't.
I unhooked the battery and there was much rejoicing. Jork found the horn and we cut the power to it, so while the headlights still flash off and on, they do so quietly.
By then, the guy with the Weber still hadn't shown up but we found a grill in the weeds and set about burning wood to get a bed of coals while Laura prepped skewers with veggies and dead animal. Delicious. I hope your day was as memorable.
Jenny Lawson: Human Shish Kabob
3 days ago